


foile à deux

by poisson (hotarumyst)



Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Teachers, Canonical Character Death, M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Some Plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-25
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-07-18 01:57:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7294879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hotarumyst/pseuds/poisson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Almost twenty years after graduating from high school together, Peony and Jade reacquaint themselves with each other when Peony becomes superintendent of the district where Jade teaches high school history.</p>
            </blockquote>





	foile à deux

**Author's Note:**

> _foile à deux_ \- the bond that exists between two people who bring out the worst in each other.

At first, Jade was the teacher _least_ opposed to his childhood friend appropriating the role as the superintendent of their school district. He'd only made some remarks, completely in jest, a month or two after Peony had officially started, the first time they'd seen each other out of the classroom in years.

"Going from congressman to school superintendent seems a little dubious, doesn’t it?" Jade had said over a glass of wine. "Something about corruption and serving too long in the public sector."

"Oh, come on, Jade," Peony replied. "The two careers are hardly comparable."

"Besides the coincidentally similar scandals that arise being in the constant scrutiny of the public eye, you mean," said Jade. Peony couldn't object to that one— the previous superintendent had become a slanderous sensation overnight, accused of arson and the burning down of his own house, the papers read, for the insurance money. That plot had all fallen awkwardly into place about a year back, and the investigations took some time, though the public opinion had soured so much on the man that he'd been forced to resign either way. Meanwhile, Peony finally decided to step down from his spot in the Senate because, as he'd claimed, it was giving him gray hairs.

"Although gold and silver never looked bad together," Peony said, running a hand through his hair.

"My findings suggest the contrary," Jade quipped back. "It's common knowledge that gold and silver clash horribly."

"Just watch, your wedding band's going to be just that. I can see it now: gold with a silver inlay, plain with some inscribed Latin on it or whatnot," Peony said in his loud, booming voice.

Jade rarely expressed the first thing he felt without careful, instant calculations of the pros and cons of any given response. Most emotions were more troublesome than anything else; with the exception of appropriate grief or other empathetically inclined states, Jade defaulted to a calm sort of amusement. The remarkable control served him well as a high school teacher, and it took a lot to even touch his composure, much less rattle it. "Thirty five is a bit late to be thinking about marriage now, don't you think?" Jade replied, smiling and looking Peony in the eye. On the occasions that Jade would feel inwardly flustered, he made sure to act the complete opposite; the best defense was always to go on the offense anyway. But Peony had already grown used to that.

"Eh, you never know. Nephry's approaching our age and she isn't married yet. Maybe it runs in the family," Peony replied, swirling the wine in his glass. "If only she'd just accept one of my many proposals," he continued dramatically, faking hurt by bringing his hand up to his chest. Peony was not above making jokes about Nephry and Jade's likeness, and there had been a point in their senior year of high school when Peony had actually asked Nephry to prom. Peony was the type who gained energy by being in the limelight; everywhere he went, he seemed to attract the attention of everyone around him, and though he'd tried to make the proposal discreet, it'd become a much publicized event, much to Nephry's displeasure. She turned him down on the spot.

Peony wasn't popular so much as emboldened by constant positive reinforcement. He wasn't the type who would lose to the petty insecurities of high school gossip; Jade witnessed it every day in his classroom as a third party deity of sorts, the rumors that spread like the Bronte sisters in the western canon. No, Peony succeeded at everything he tried, and Jade knew better than to stop him.

"She never did return my call from the other day," Peony mused.

"Oh, right, she told me to tell you congratulations," said Jade, and Peony frowned.

"That's cold," said Peony.

There was a bit of a tussle over the check, but Jade had always had superior reflexes despite his smaller build. They played videogames together as children, a mix of fighting, racing, and co-op role-playing games, whatever struck Jade's fancy. Part of Jade wondered if Peony was simply humoring him all those years, but Peony had seemed to genuinely enjoy it at the time, winning sometimes at the racing games but losing at all others. They'd never gotten the hang of existing together as adults, though— who'd pay for dinner, or should they go dutch? Did Peony like beer, or was he more of a wine person? Had he grown into the womanizer all signs pointed to back when they were in school? Such a role would reflect badly on his political career, Jade mused, but the status at the same time must've been able to get him anything, or anyone, he wanted, without much resistance; that is, if his irritatingly good looks and magnetic presence didn't already do it for him. Jade wouldn't try to deny it at this point— after all, he'd been drawn in, too.

Peony's hand landed on Jade's a moment after Jade's closed around the check; Jade felt the familiar slip of Peony's warm but calloused palm against the back of his hand. Jade's gaze flicked up at Peony, and when it arrived at his face, Jade noticed that Peony had already been watching him. Peony's hand tightened around Jade's for a moment, then pulled away. "I'll pick it up next time," Peony said, adding, "and you better not try to fight for it."

"Oh, I don't mind you paying," Jade said, reaching for his wallet in his pocket. "Pride, money— they're of more or less the same value to me, anyway."

"As a high school teacher, I don't imagine you get much of either," replied Peony. "Why don't you go for a doctorate's? You could continue working. With your intelligence and skillset, you could get it done in four, five years tops."

"And let my students take second priority? I'm hurt that you take me as such a person, Peony," Jade said, and Peony grinned.

"Don't give me that bullshit. I heard your students call you The Necromancer because you have a way with reviving tired students and scaring them shitless for daring to sleep in your class," Peony said, his smile still wide and heartbreakingly genuine.

"Sounds frightening. Rumors spread fast through those halls," said Jade. "Please, I do it out of love." Jade reached for his wine glass subconsciously again before noticing that it was empty, and he wondered if ordering an after-dinner drink would look too conspicuous. They're out as coworkers, _coworkers_ , though superintendents hardly went out in private with history teachers to formal restaurants in the middle of the week. "It's a competitive job market in this economy," Jade started, and Peony looked at him. "A PhD is just an unnecessary burden; it calls for higher pay, which most districts aren't willing to give. A master's is just fine to teach advanced classes."

Peony sighed, and Jade smiled, half as an automatic response and half at the realization that Peony, when conversing with people, always seemed to know exactly how the other party wanted him to react. There was a sense of magic to it almost, Peony's fluency in every unspoken language that fell under the umbrella of human interaction. "Professor Curtiss has a ring to it, though, don't you think?"

"Do I look like the type to stoop so low?" Jade said, a characteristic lilt to his voice.

"Most would consider it a step _up_ , you know."

Jade waved his hand with measured nonchalance. "Professors hardly teach, anyway. If there's a group of kids who are possibly _more_ ungrateful and entitled than high school students, it's college students."

"Really?" said Peony, raising his eyebrow. "More entitled than Luke fon Fabre?"

Jade sighed, prompting a chuckle from Peony. "I'd hoped we could go one night without talking about that child. He's a good kid, you know. Just sheltered. Misguided." Luke was a particular student in Jade's homeroom and 7th period class whose father had come to the superintendent personally to warn him (and the entire district, Jade supposed) about Luke's unconventional homeschooling up until that point. Having been kicked out of several public schools as a child, Luke had been floating between some private schools before he was ten. He suffered serious head trauma from an accident at that age and lost most of his memories, prompting the homeschooling. It was a miracle he'd been able to catch up with his grade level at all, though his social skills left something to be desired. He'd pick fights with kids way bigger than him, bicker with the vice principal on the daily, grab things from the lunch line without paying. His peers both made fun of him and admired his offbeat brand of sincerity.

"I kid, I kid. His parents seem to have the right idea, though they're the very example of helicopter parents if I'd ever seen one," said Peony.

"They're angels compared to the Grants family," Jade pointed out. "You're lucky you haven't had the pleasure of meeting with them yet, though I hear their younger daughter is entering high school soon."

"All comes with the territory," said Peony. "I didn't enter this career because I was forced to, you know." He looked directly at Jade then, and something in Peony's gaze still felt unnerving, even after all those years Jade had spent hardening himself to superficial wit and charm, or possibly to Peony specifically, though Jade would never admit it if you asked.

Jade spent the car ride home treading stoically in Peony's scent. The sun had long since set, obscuring the scenery that Jade had already passed dozens of times anyway. Living in one place for almost twenty years really alienated you, in a way, to the landscape that appeared more to pass you by as a familiar painting rather than as real objects.

New-car-smell was a scent Jade had always associated with Peony. Perhaps it was a scent that was simultaneously classy and irritating— associated with both desire and regret. Peony's cars managed to smell new for years after he bought them, ever since the new BMW he'd managed to wrangle from his mother in high school, a few months before he'd even passed the road test. It was completely dark at that point, and Jade focused on the dizzying _presence_ of Peony alone. Peony turned the radio off; that was how Jade used to like it in high school since Peony's taste in everything vaguely artistic, fashion, music, even food, was frighteningly bad. Last Jade heard, Peony had been venturing into the intricaties of country music due to a recent television show that was described as suspiciously captivating.

Jade remembered being quiet as a child. His memories from that time were muddled as well, which might've explained why he was sympathetic to a frankly (so far) undeserving Luke. They were alike in some ways, Jade begrudgingly admitted; he'd been obstinate and condescending toward teachers and authority figures as well, though not in quite as brash of a manner as Luke felt obliged to act. Jade remembered meeting everything and everyone, even Peony and Saphir, his two closest "friends" at the time, with cool contempt; an ambiguous apathy that even the densest of people could read as a manifestation of Jade's own childish sense of superiority. He had the intelligence to back it up, though.

There was only one teacher whom he'd even recognized as a _teacher_ at the time. Most of him regretted not treating Ms. Nebilim with more respect back then, but a small part of him was glad he'd even had the sense to treat her like a human being at all. It wasn't so much the content of her curriculum as it was the way she interacted with Jade. Most teachers valued the so-called "fairness" bullshit that happened to be trending lately; resolute not to treat Jade any differently than the other students, they were so tragically _inept_ at the task that the rest of the class could feel it, too. No, Gelda Nebilim knew that if it was attention Jade had craved, it was attention he'd get. If it was challenge that Jade so desperately lacked, it was challenge she'd give him. _Gifted_ , sure, he got that descriptor all the time. _Talented_ was another one people threw around, not knowing that all those words meant to him was _monster_. Learning from Gelda was the first time he'd ever felt truly _wanted_.

"It's Ms. Nebilim, isn't it," Peony asked then, his words cutting through the dull silence in the car.

"Sorry," said Jade. "I haven't seen you for a while, and—"

"No, it's fine," Peony replied. "Understandable, even. I should be the one to apologize for inviting you out so suddenly. And lying about it."

"I knew," Jade said. "That it wasn't going to be some cocktail party. If I hadn't, do you think I would've come?"

"Touché," Peony said. "I thought you might be more comfortable with other people there."

"You think I can't handle all of your presence alone?" said Jade.

"Quite the contrary," said Peony. "I think you're the _only_ one who can. It's just... been a while, I guess."

Jade didn't reply to this, just continued to stare forward into the sparsely lit distance.

Peony lived in a large, awkwardly-shaped house that was distinctly bottom-heavy, perfect for entertaining guests and taking gratuitous pictures. It was more or less a decorative bachelor pad. Peony tried to hide the imbalanced design with a dense forest of foliage surrounding the house— against the recommendation of his interior designer, of course, and it only managed to make the house even more conspicuous. Jade had only seen it once until now, driving past the neighborhood to carpool with one of his coworkers one morning, but a single look at the monstrosity and Jade had known. Uncharacteristically, it took Jade until they were pulling into Peony's driveway for him to realize that they Peony wasn't planning to take Jade back home. "This isn't my house," Jade said lamely.

Peony snorted at that. Only Peony, with a single unexpected decision, could render Jade so speechless.

Jade was, as you could say, a sexual work-in-progress. He'd never been able to form a lasting romantic relationship with anyone, though his working companionship with Peony from elementary to high school came pretty close. Since then, though, he'd gone on dates at the insistence of Nephry; sometimes she even set him up with people she'd found, and at one point he'd been sitting next to a drunk and sobbing Saphir who'd insisted on telling him his life story since they'd parted ways after their high school graduation. That had been a few years ago, and Jade remembered, slightly inebriated at the time, that it was sad he'd seen Saphir more than he'd seen Peony since then. Saphir had made a move on him, but Jade didn't fuck drunk people, and he didn't feel anything toward Saphir anyway other than a mild unsympathetic pity. Jade hailed a cab for the both of them to Jade's own flat and woke up to a mild headache, not induced by alcohol but rather by a screaming Saphir. And that had been the last set-up by Jade's well-intentioned younger sister, three years ago.

And now here he was, sitting in the passenger seat of Peony's luxury car, pulling into Peony's winding driveway, contemplating the fact that all the carefully calculated decisions he'd made in life had eventually brought him to this moment.

"You know, most people would be exhilarated by the idea of me taking them home for the night," Peony murmured in a sing-song voice, and Jade held back a familiar shiver at the implication of Peony's words directed right at him.

Jade had forgotten to mention the sex. It had originally been, to no one's surprise, Peony's idea. It had happened, to no one's surprise, during their junior year in high school. Any and all assumptions made about Jade's sexuality at that point were moot, because he frankly didn't care enough to let them encroach on his everyday life. He listened to the speculations about Peony without much feeling either way because he knew Peony didn't care either.

It had been an unusually hot afternoon in June, as they always were, when Peony, lying on Jade's bed, said, "I kind of want to kiss your sister."

After a pause, Jade had replied, "You know, most people don't tell that to their crush's _older brother_."

Peony laughed in that way he always did to Jade's composed retorts. "I know, but I trust you."

"Trust me to what? Avoid the rising temptation to murder you in cold blood?" Jade said, not looking up from his laptop.

Peony sat up then, stretching luxuriously like a domesticated mountain lion. "You wouldn't," he said, then adding, almost as an afterthought, "You couldn't."

They both had known subconsciously that Peony had stepped out of line there.

Jade had always known there was something different about Ms. Nebilim. That she taught not just for her students, nor for the passionate enlightenment of self-righteous morality for which most teachers so arrogantly lusted. Jade saw right through their masks of self-delusion and denial. No, Ms. Nebilim taught for something intangible. When Jade had asked her about it on the second day of school, she'd smiled and said, "The future. I teach for the future, Jade Balfour."

It was that investment in the "future" that brought Gelda Nebilim rolling in her Tesla from her primary job to a second job in a nuclear powerplant she'd inherited from her parents when she'd graduated college at 19. Jade had never show interest in anything so resolutely as he'd begged Ms. Nebilim to take him to her lab, and she always insisted that she'd take him "as soon as she was no longer his teacher." Jade, with Peony's help, since Ms. Nebilim always regarded Peony as charming and gifted, though not as singularly brilliant as Jade, managed to whittle the timeline from when Jade graduated high school to as soon as Jade graduated from her class.

And, as promised, Ms. Nebilim picked Jade up in her conspicuously expensive energy-efficient car and they were on their way to the place that would change Jade's life forever. Though that place didn't end up being Ms. Nebilim's lab.

All life-changing moments, Jade realized, took place when Jade was seated in the passenger seat of an important person's expensive car. Jade half-expected one of Peony's outlandish trees to suddenly fall on the hood of his car at that moment, with Peony waiting for Jade's response to his sexual advances, killing them both instantly.

Jade hoped that was how Ms. Nebilim died, without unnecessary pain. He knew that wasn't the case, though.

"Can I call you Gelda now?" Jade had asked quietly, seated in her passenger seat, barely registering the unexpectedly smooth and quiet ride of the powerful vehicle.

Ms. Nebilim laughed. "It might take me a while to get used to. None of my former students have asked me that, even the ones who've already graduated high school."

Jade quieted then, sulking internally at the mention of Ms. Nebilim's other students, the previous ones that Jade liked to pretend had never existed. He'd never felt a need to occupy someone's entire world out of neediness but more out of pride for his own arrogant genius. He wanted to be the only student Ms. Nebilim remembered. He wanted to be mentioned to future classes. He dreamed of working at Ms. Nebilim's lab one day.

It was late evening slipping into night; Ms. Nebilim wanted to take him in after hours when she could show him things without disturbances, she'd said. Not that Jade could really tell the time through the pouring rain. The windshield wipers were working in overdrive, the only sound Jade heard in the car. The engine made barely a hum, characteristic of cars of that caliber. "Don't sulk," she said, as if reading him. "Maybe when you—" she started, never finishing the sentence.

Jade remembered looking at her for only an instant then, noticing that her eyes were on him. Jade's hair had grown down to his shoulders by that age, barely brushing his collarbones. He'd begun wearing glasses, simple rounded frames from the kids' section of the store. His eyes were a warm brown, bordering on red. Ms. Nebilim's eyes were red, too, like his.

It had been a small truck, an eight-wheeler, that collided head-on into the driver's side of Ms Nebilim's car. Jade barely remembered what the impact felt like, only that one moment they were moving and the next they were not, and suddenly, it was simultaneously too cold, the rain from outside hitting his body, and too hot, the engine of the truck on fire.

It wad a country road— high speed limits that most civilians disregarded and no guard rails. The truck driver hadn't slept in 36 hours, devastated over the recent diagnosis of his mother with breast cancer. It was simultaneously no one's fault and everyone's fault; Jade was morally confident enough to know that was what the judge and doctors would say. They'd told him all this in the hospital while he was bedridden with mild injuries.

Ms. Nebilim wasn't so fortunate. Her hospital visit had unearthed a host of other medical issues related to her work at the lab, which had been sponsored by the government. Jade hadn't known the extent of her research, but now he had at least a vague idea. Gelda Nebilim never awoke from her coma, and her family decided to pull the plug a month later, when the prognosis was close to zero. Jade hadn't gotten any say in it.

Jade never got over feeling what he assumed to be guilt over the entire incident— urging her to take him to the lab that day, distracting her in the car, even _surviving_ when he believed she should've instead. And wanting to keep her alive when he knew she was suffering. He was never told the exact cause of her death, and his family thought it better to keep him away from the subject. The next two years was Jade mastering the skill of passing as a human being, of going through the motions of daily life convincingly, while never really feeling that he existed in this world.

And then, it was the summer after junior year, Peony and Jade alone in Jade's room with Jade sitting on the floor on his laptop and Peony outstretched on the bed, twirling his hair.

Jade had become more personable, more tolerable. The passable shadow of a human being. Doctors and therapists called the transformation both magnificent and suspect, but no one looked further into it, and Jade never blamed them, really. He calculated the common expressions and side-effects of trauma-related guilt and acted them accordingly— the good ones, of course. Imitating an empathetic human being was hard work after all, but Jade pulled it off convincingly, and the only ones who noticed a difference were Saphir, who distanced himself from Jade because of his own personal issues, and Peony, who stayed with him. Jade could never fully formulate _why_ , exactly, Peony continued to stick by his side, but he chalked that up to his own superficial understanding of human empathy. Jade pondered it many nights in the shower, Saphir leaving because he'd admired Jade in his own weird way, making it a twisted goal to become as desensitized and unsympathetic as Jade, which was a recipe for failure. Saphir had always had difficulties accepting his own pitiful personality, and as he watched Jade becoming "softer," as he put it, he'd felt betrayed, Jade assumed.

"Jade?" Peony said, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. "Hey, did you hear what I was saying?"

Jade shook his head. "You're right," Jade said. "I couldn't kill you in cold blood. I might feel a bit guilty about it, just a bit."

Peony laughed again, and Jade heard a breath of relief mixed in there. "You're not serious."

"I'm always serious," Jade said with a shrug. Jade figured then was when that had become a catchphrase for him.

"So I was saying I might kiss you for practice."

That got Jade's attention. He stopped typing for a moment, gaze still glued to the computer screen, the words becoming fuzzy. "You know I'm not really _practiced_ at this, Peony."

"Neither is Nephry, right? It's perfect."

"Mention my sister again, and I'll—"

And then, Peony's fingers were tracing Jade's jaw for a moment before tilting Jade's head back. Jade's first thought was that Peony had been holding out on him. Where were those reflexes when Jade was pummeling him offstage into the kill zone? Jade tensed up as an automatic response, and he remembered feeling relieved that at least _that_ part of him was human.

Peony pressed his lips to Jade's, softly at first, then a little more insistently. Jade felt his body relax; it felt the familiarity of Peony's presence, the safeness of his hold. It wasn't the response Jade wanted. After years of practiced suspicion, Jade felt disproportionately frustrated that Peony could dismantle it all with the fervent press of his lips, with the touch of something as primal as lust. Peony was asking him a favor, and logically, Jade didn't want Nephry to have a bad first kiss experience. But the vigor with which Jade's body responded disgusted him.

When Peony pulled back, he gave Jade a once-over and said, "You have a surprisingly lewd body."

"I'll take that as a compliment," Jade said, but his voice came out breathy. Peony's smirk only grew into a wide grin, and Jade could think of no other word than "pounce" to describe the way Peony lunged toward him, tackling him to the ground. "You know, from your behavior, you'd think it was me that you wanted to kiss and not Nephry," said Jade. Peonly only hummed against Jade's neck.

Jade wasn't weak; he had a slim build but had looked into moves that he'd practiced on Peony from time to time to gain the upper hand in case unsavory men ever came his way. It'd been Nephry's idea, of course— every practical idea in Jade's memory had come from the brain of his younger sister who was also brilliant in her own high functioning way. But that day, Peony had caught him off-guard; tripping him with an offhand comment about Nephry, and then pinning him with such force to which his body fell prey like taking candy from a child. Sometimes Peony made plans, and whenever he did, they fell into place spectacularly without any of the puppets becoming self-aware until it was too late. Currently, Jade was feeling the repercussions of "too late," his back arching off the carpet as Peony's hands snaked down Jade's sides.

"You're still human," Peony whispered as he brought his hand up to Jade's lips and Jade instinctively licked them. Jade didn't remember vocalizing those deep inner thoughts to Peony at any point, but his own thoughts at the moment were foggy, drunk off Peony's suspiciously skilled touches.

That afternoon was mostly touches and Peony exploring, finding where Jade was most sensitive, most responsive. Peony occasionally got bolder in the following weeks, even got Jade to come most of the time, and Jade would've returned the favor if he'd known anything about sex at that age. His body was over-responsive; even hearing Peony jerk himself off in the bathroom after helping Jade was almost enough to get Jade off again. Eventually, Peony would just do it in front of him, neither of them laying a finger on one another, Peony staring at Jade from under hooded eyes and occasionally murmuring things like, "Don't be so quiet Jade, I want to hear you come apart," and Jade trying unsuccessfully to keep a straight face.

Those summer days were so long ago that Jade barely remembered if they really happened or not; such was a common response from survivors of sexual harassment, Jade recalled numbly. Childhood, to Jade, meant the time before he began compartmentalizing his memories and sorting them into neat little boxes, not unlike the drawers in an advent calendar, and locking away the unresolved emotions that came with them. Jade wasn't so arrogant as to believe that he was immune to human emotion or otherwise above the human existence. Rather, he envied the predictability of emotions; it was his own sociopathically blank face that pushed people away. Physical sensations evoked a much more "normal" response, but Jade didn't find them particularly hygenic, pleasurable, or memorable; at least, not in retrospect.

"I know it's only been two minutes, but days have probably passed by already in that brain of yours," Peony was saying, looking at his watch, "And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't curious about the answer that you took so long to arrive at."

"Always with the wordiness," Jade said lightly, still not looking Peony in the eye.

"What can I say, I'm a man of many words," Peony replied.

Peony was on edge. Jade could tell that much by the overly ostentatious behavior, the way Peony stared at him (usually Peony couldn't be bothered, seeing Jade every day) but didn't move in closer. The fact that he was trying to hide it, which he should've calculated to be impossible around Jade, also supported his anxious demeanor. Perhaps it was the fact that a nervous Peony was so endearing. Then again, maybe it was all an act, something he'd learned from his years as a senator. "Sure," Jade said, turning to look at Peony. A moment of surprise flickered across Peony's expression before melting into bewilderment, though Jade knew better than to assume Peony didn't know exactly what question Jade was responding to. "I suppose I have a few minutes to spare. I've always wanted to see just how atrocious the inside of your house managed to become."

Peony broke into a defenseless grin, his hair becoming a blonde shock as he swooped in, pausing just in front of Jade's face and murmuring, "Can I?"

"Mmm," Jade replied, leaning in to close the remainder of the distance. Peony's lips felt unfamiliar, which was to be expected, considering the years during which Jade had steeled himself to emotions (after falling into what he hadn't known to be love, and then rejecting it from the very core of his being). Their lips touched lightly at first, almost surgically, as they tested the waters— the heat, the pressure, the depth to which they could probe. Every movement of Jade's was methodical and calculated, and he found he could no longer predict Peony's next move; yet, instead of feeling apprehensive, Jade noted a sense of emerging excitement. He sighed when Peony leaned over him, flinched when Peony's hand went to his waist; the skin there underneath his clothes tingled, vascillating between tensing up and softening, opening to Peony's hands. "I see you've learned some manners," Jade mumbled when Peony pulled back slightly, and Peony smiled.

"I was wondering if you remembered that."

"Don't be ridiculous," Jade said with a small level of irritated snap that he reserved for Peony alone, even after all these years. Peony let out a quiet growl which surprised even Jade. "You knew."

"You caught me," Peony said, low in his throat. "I've been thinking about you for years."

"Let's not get into those sappy platitudes right now," Jade said, pulling back so suddenly that Peony nearly toppled over into the passenger seat. Jade opened the door with a surprising amount of control as the cold air outside washed over him, clearing his head slightly, at least enough for him to swing his legs out of the car and stalk to the door. Peony stumbled behind him; Jade heard the slam of the car door and guessed how long it would take Peony to reach him, but again, Peony exceeded his expectations. As soon as Jade reached the front door, he saw Peony's hand dart out from the corner of his eye as Peony fit his key into the slot, coming up close behind Jade.

Peony had filled out since high school, but the shadow enveloping Jade's felt much more imposing in real life than the broad-shouldered man Jade had seen in the newspapers so many times. Peony's breath down the back of Jade's collar made him shiver subconsciously, a movement that didn't go unnoticed by Peony, who jerked the door open then and ushered Jade inside, crowding him against the door before it had even shut fully.

The arousal Jade felt in the pit of his stomach felt foreign and suffocating, making the blood rush to his head as Peony locked him in with his hands against the door on either side of Jade's shoulders. Peony moved slightly to flick on the foyer light, and a glimpse of Peony's face was all Jade got before Peony closed in on him again, kissing him harder this time, as if he'd been holding back before. Jade had been so focused on his own movements that he hadn't realized how desperate Peony really was. Peony sucked in a loud breathe through his nose when Jade finally started kissing back, parting his lips slightly and moving them against Peony's in the only way he knew how.

"Sorry," Peony mumbled as he kissed Jade hard and short, again and again.

Jade held back a wordy retort and instead said, "No need," lightly, and Peony's shoulders shook as he chuckled, and Jade realized that he'd wrapped his arms around Peony's neck.

"You haven't changed," Peony said, leaning back slightly.

"Is that an insult?" Jade replied.

Peony tucked a strand of hair tenderly behind Jade's ear, and Jade's eyebrows furrowed. "Relax," Peony said.

"I can't," Jade said automatically.

Peony sighed. "I know." He pulled back and shrugged off his jacket, tossing it onto the stair railing as he made his way up the stairs, Jade crossing his ams and following behind him like a wary cat. "And that's why I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault," Jade said, dropping into his serious tone, and then, thinking better of it, added, "It's okay."

Peony marched into the first room at the top of the stairs, and from the looks of it— the mess, clothes strewn all over the floor, books lining a makeshift path from the bookshelf to his desk, bed haphazardly made— it was definitely Peony's room. Peony fell back onto the bed heavily and threw an arm over his eyes as if the mere sight of it had suddenly drained all the earlier energy out of him. "And now _you're_ the one comforting _me_ ," he said. "I'm pathetic."

"If you keep acting like a petulant child, I'm leaving," Jade said, moving to sit beside Peony. As he reached the bed, though, he paused in front of Peony's legs and decided to crawl on top of him instead, seating himself on Peony's lap despite his earlier discomfort. Leaning down, Jade murmured, "This isn't the Peony I came here for."

"Oh?" Peony said, the corner of his mouth quirking into a smile. "I thought you said you couldn't relax."

"Make me," Jade said.

Peony groaned. "You know, for someone who doesn't like sex, you're awfully good at it."

"I'm not going to pretend I know what you mean by that," said Jade, undoing Peony's tie with mechanical motions.

"You almost make stiff look sexy," Peony replied, heaving himself into a sitting position and helping Jade with the tie. He glanced up at Jade, lifting his leg just the slightest— making it seem like an accidental motion— and shifting against Jade's crotch. Jade shivered with Peony's eyes on him, leering at him, and _god_ , that was possibly the worst time to lose the lock on his complete control over himself, right when Peony was watching. Or perhaps Peony watching was what always made Jade lose his composure. "Almost," Peony added emphatically, sweeping his hand over Jade's hips and squeezing his fingertips in until they bruised. "All those years ago," Peony started.

"You weren't playing with me," Jade said.

Peony leaned in, nipping at Jade's neck. "You trusted me that much?" he said lowly.

"Not then," Jade said, tilting his head to the side to give Peony access. "No bruises, please," he added, threading his hand into Peony's hair.

"No _visible_ bruises?" Peony mumbled.

"Mmm," Jade conceded. "I didn't know how to trust then. I trust you now."

Peony reached Jade's collarbone and bit down, causing Jade to jerk and hit Peony's head lightly in complaint. "Turtlenecks are lovely things," replied Peony amusedly, nursing the area with the cool pads of his fingers. Jade didn't know what made him shiver again, maybe the dip of Peony's fingers into where his neck met his collarbones, just under his shirt, but Jade let out a violent shake that time, letting it course through his body. He shifted his ass on Peony's dick, which was showing obvious interest. Peony groaned in response, bucking his hips up. "You're doing that on purpose."

"You caught me," Jade said lowly, grinning and biting down on Peony's upper lip.

"While these slacks do look fantastic on you—" Peony started.

Jade rolled his eyes. "Please, you've been staring at my ass the entire night."

Peony's fingers dipped under the waistband of Jade's pants, causing him to arch forward into Peony's hold. "You caught me," Peony echoed. He slid his hands to the front of Jade's pants, deftly undoing the clasp. Jade moaned at the pressure so infuriatingly near his cock but not quite touching it, and Peony's hands ghosted away as quickly as they arrived, as if they'd never been there at all. "How long has it been since you've had sex?"

Jade laughed breathlessly as he let his head slump on Peony’s shoulder as Peony massaged the inside of his thigh, as if trying to coax an answer out of him. "A while, admittedly. Too many failed first dates, so I took a break." Jade felt Peony smile into his neck, and he continued, "You should consider yourself lucky."

"Oh, I always have," Peony said.

Jade shifted up onto his knees and let his pants slip down, revealing under Jade's button down shirt plain briefs at which Peony made no effort to conceal his stare, raking his gaze over Jade's hips. Years of shared bedrooms, bluntly asked inquiries (courtesy of teenage Jade), and even nights where they’d slept in the same bed, a hot line of sexual tension separating where their two backs had been facing each other had all led up to this; for once, Jade was grateful for his apparently lack of shame being naked around Peony, and he even twisted his body the slightest bit, guiding Peony’s gaze to where Jade’s legs were spread across Peony’s thighs.

A moment later, Jade found himself flipped onto his back. Peony hovered over him, and the sheer strength Peony used to flip their positions in an instant was embarrassingly arousing to Jade. Peony shoved Jade's pants down and tugged Jade's underwear, alternating between light and rough motions, scraping Jade’s thighs slightly with his blunt fingernails as Jade kicked his pants the rest of the way off. Jade's shirt was the next to go, though Jade did away with Peony's as well, running his hands along Peony's toned arms, tanned skin blanching where Jade squeezed. Jade wrapped his legs around Peony's hips instinctively and leaned his head up to murmur, "Tell me what to do."

"God," Peony said roughly, grabbing Jade's hair and tugging his head back to give Peony access to Jade's pale neck once again. "You're making it hard not to come right now from the sound of your voice like that."

"It's not like we haven't talked all this time," Jade said, though he'd be hard pressed to admit that he enjoyed Peony’s eagerness— it normalized it, made it feel like he wasn’t the only overexcited, untouched, unwittingly celibate one among the two of them.

"Never in this context," Peony mumbled against Jade’s neck. "Would you get turned on from me asking for a copy of your lesson plans in the middle of the hallway?"

"Oh, I bet I could condition that into you," Jade teased, and Peony growled, pushing Jade’s wrists into the bed again.

"Don’t you dare."

Jade hummed and watched Peony crawl off of him to reach into the top drawer of his nightstand, the same place he’d kept it when they still lived in Keterburg. Old habits die hard, especially given that Peony, after years of mingling with the most powerful, intelligent, and desirable men and women in the country, still wanted Jade.

"Oh, come on," Peony said, rummaging through what Jade imagined to be a mess of flashlights, discarded paperwork, dog treats, and tissues. "It’s not like you aren’t one of those people."

"Don’t get all sappy on me," Jade said, crossing his legs. "It’s not sexy."

"Oh, don’t tell me my Jade likes being worshipped in bed," Peony sang, appearing over Jade again after Jade settled himself into the pillows at Peony’s headboard. Jade stifled a groan when Peony started trailing his hands around the insides of Jade’s thighs again. Jade could pick out a slight fragrance to the lube, but it didn’t smell like anything in particular, which was surprising considering Peony’s trademark flamboyance in every other aspect of his life. "Mm, you _are_ beautiful, you know," Peony continued, running his fingers over small scars on Jade’s stomach and hips from the car accident. Jade knew he subconsciously avoided those spots in everyday life, while dressing himself or sometimes when he showered, and the sensitivity showed when he shivered as Peony kept exploring his skin.

Jade’s thighs trembled when Peony pushed them apart, and although he was able to keep his facial expression flat, he noticed a betraying flush run down the length of his chest and stomach. "Hm, you do like it," Peony said.

"God, anyone would respond like that," Jade replied, shivering when Peony let the lube drip over the backs of Jade’s thighs.

"Why, thank you," Peony said, not giving Jade any time to retort again as he leaned in close, pressing a kiss to Jade’s lips and circling Jade's entrance with his fingers at the same time. Jade held his breath and tensed up instinctively as Peony pushed his finger slowly in. "Relax," Peony murmured, licking the seam of Jade’s lips, coaxing them open with the same gentle rhythm he’d used over and over that day.

"I—can’t," Jade said, but he parted his lips anyway, letting Peony’s tongue trace the walls of his mouth. He used his tense energy to suck on Peony’s tongue, to pull Peony closer with his arms.

"You can," Peony said, thrusting his finger shallowly, his breathing becoming more labored as he watched Jade flush underneath him. "You’re just not letting yourself." Peony reached between them with his other hand and wrapped it around Jade’s cock, and Jade let out a choked gasp, jerking his hips up into Peony’s hand. Jade admitted that in his discomfort, he’d forgotten about the heat pooling in his lower stomach, forgotten the way Peony handled him, thrusting his fingers (two now) in and out even with Jade’s erratic movements. "That’s it," Peony murmured, watching Jade come apart as he distracted him.

Jade felt his body become pliant under Peony, and while they’d messed around in high school time after time, it was never like this, never so _intimate_. With his body a resigned mess, the only function Jade had control over was his breathing, chest heaving against Peony’s skin as Peony worked him open, stretching him apart. And it felt good, liberating in a way, to be so exposed— but only to Peony, the man who was handling him with such care while simultaneously pushing all the buttons that would draw out the embarrassing, wanton noises from Jade’s lips that Jade didn’t know he was capable of making.

Peony was panting, too, rutting up against Jade’s thigh as his hands began to lose their steady rhythm. Jade blinked his eyes open for a moment and noted that Peony had closed his eyes, no doubt imagining how his dick would feel inside Jade as he patiently, painstakingly prepared him.

Jade managed a smile and reached for Peony’s hand, and Peony opened his eyes blearily as he pulled out. Jade brought Peony’s fingers to his lips with one hand while reaching for the lube with the other. "I’m not made of glass, you know," Jade murmured, darting his tongue out to shower Peony’s fingers with attention. He reveled in the way Peony’s breath caught in his throat.

"Th—that’s, that just proves you haven’t done this before," Peony said while his dick twitched in anticipation as he watched Jade coat his palm with lube.

"I’ll be fine," Jade said, "I have a high pain tolerance."

Peony winced when Jade first grasped his dick; the lube was cold between his fingers, but it heated up quickly. "I don’t want it to hurt—I mean," Peony said when Jade rolled his eyes. "Not just pain. Jade, I want you to feel good. So you’ll want to come back for more."

Jade’s hand slowed then and he could feel Peony tense, trying to keep himself from thrusting into Jade’s hand. "Peony Upala Malkuth, I let you jerk me off and talk dirty to me when we were _sixteen_ ," Jade said. He looked up at Peony and met his gaze, directly confronting the serious and yet subtly adorable kicked-puppy expression Peony wore when he furrowed his eyebrows together and really focused. Jade continued, "I didn’t even know I was gay then, I thought it was disgusting, and I didn’t _want_ it to feel good." He interrupted himself with chaste, hard kisses that left Peony following after him each time he pulled away. "But it felt so fucking _good_." Jade slid his thumb over Peony’s slit then, and Peony moaned. "I may not have been normal then, but I assure you, I wasn’t bound or broken. Peony, I never stopped you."

"Because I was forcing you," Peony said, looking away even as sweat dripped down his flushed face, eyes heavy with guilt and arousal.

"As I said, I’m not made of glass," Jade replied. "When you treat me like I am, it's frankly insulting." To make it a point, Jade tangled his hand in Peony’s hair, forcing his head within millimeters of Jade’s lips, and grinned right against Peony’s mouth. "Trust me, if I wanted you to stop, you’d know."

Jade kissed Peony and held on, tentatively at first, moving his lips softly against Peony’s until he felt Peony’s wicked grin return. Peony tilted his head, slotting his mouth against Jade’s and nibbling on Jade’s lower lip. "Remind me to make you ride me next time."

"Peony, hurry up and fuck me," Jade said as Peony began circling Jade’s entrance with his dick again, no doubt holding the damn thing just to tease Jade.

Peony hummed happily. "I love when you beg," he said, rubbing circles into Jade’s thighs with the pad of his thumb.

The initial intrusion felt just as uncomfortable as Peony’s fingers. Jade clutched at Peony’s back, his nails digging into Peony’s shoulder blades. Peony opened his mouth to speak, but Jade said, "Relax. I know, I’m trying."

Peony nodded, bringing his hand up to Jade’s mouth and tracing Jade’s lips with his thumb. "Pretty," Peony said, and Jade resisted the urge to roll his eyes again. "You know, it helps if you don’t take yourself so seriously," Peony said in reply to Jade’s expression, forcing his thumb in Jade’s mouth. It caught Jade off-guard but he didn’t mind it, taking the opportunity to maneuver his tongue around Peony’s thumb as Peony pushed in, bit by bit.

"I’m always serious," Jade said when he pulled back, twisting his mouth into a smirk. Peony’s eyes were fixed on the saliva that connected Jade’s lips to his finger, and Jade let his tongue dart out to lick his lips. "Thinking, it’s what I do."

"Not when I’m done with you," Peony said, his grin so wide his teeth were showing. Maybe it was the way his hair fell around his face, shadowing it save for his teeth that appeared almost sharp against dusty, chapped lips; maybe it was the corniness itself against the reality that Peony currently had complete control over Jade’s body; maybe it was some overwhelming combination of the two that made Jade moan and push back against Peony, effectively burying Peony in him to the hilt. " _Fuck_ , Jade," Peony choked out, and Jade could only respond with restrained, shaky panting and a squeeze to Peony’s shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Just—give me a moment," Jade said, mouth against Peony’s neck. "I’ll be fine. Go slow."

"It’s hard, you know," Peony said slowly, watching for Jade’s reaction, "with you all eager like that, wrapped around me, fucking yourself on me."

Jade’s cock twitched embarrassingly at that, and Jade buried his face in Peony’s neck further to avoid the grin he knew was spreading across Peony’s face. Peony began thrusting shallowly, rolling his hips to hit multiple angles. Jade felt his body unravel and begin to move organically, chasing the feeling of fullness when Peony pulled out and spreading his legs when Peony pushed in again. It felt slow, safe, rhythmic, the cadence matching Peony’s breaths against Jade’s shoulder. "Harder," Jade murmured, and Peony stopped, caught in a momentary shudder. He pulled out completely and thrust back in all the way in one swift movement, grazing something inside Jade that made _pleasure_ , simultaneously overwhelming and incomplete, shoot through Jade’s body. Jade let out a loud, high-pitched whine that was muffled only slightly by Peony’s coarse hair, clenching and tightening his legs around Peony’s waist.

Peony groaned and dropped his head against Jade’s shoulder. "Fuck, if you want me to last, don’t do that."

"Yeah, no," Jade panted, kissing Peony hard and shoving his tongue into Peony’s mouth, legs still trembling. "You’re doing that again, I don’t care if you come embarrassingly quickly. You have your dick up my ass, so you better be obligated to make me feel good."

Peony growled, and between their panting and the obscene noises of Peony fucking him, it sounded low and possessive and devolving. "You’re not allowed to be that coherent."

"Shut— _ahh_ , shut me up, then," Jade said. Peony cut him off with another thrust against his prostate that made Jade’s toes curl, tension coursing up his trembling calves.

"That sounds like an invitation," Peony murmured, leaning back to look down at his handiwork and tucking a stray strand of hair behind Jade’s ear. He continued where he left off there, hitting Jade’s prostate with surprising precision. "I want to see how pretty you’ll look when you come apart for me." That, coupled with Peony’s hand finally reaching between them and tugging roughly on Jade’s cock, sent Jade over the edge. Jade’s vision blacked out as he came, arching right into Peony’s arms, his body convulsing in erotic shudders that made Peony groan and grab the back of his waist. It felt both too long and too short, Peony milking him through his orgasm as Jade let every inch of his body curl and tighten around Peony’s cock. Jade’s cries sounded broken and desperate, some part of him registering how amusingly sick it was that Peony was getting off on that, biting painful marks into Jade’s throat as his thrusts grew erratic and rhythmless, wringing the friction from Jade tightening around him.

"You too," Jade breathed, catching Peony in a searing, sloppy kiss that tasted like sweat and blood and had saliva dripping down their chins as Jade sucked hard on Peony’s tongue. Peony groaned loud when he came, and Jade immediately felt it inside him, dripping down his thighs as Peony trembled around him. It wasn’t the most pleasant feeling, but Jade was far too gone to mind it particularly.

Peony collapsed on top of Jade, and they lied there panting for a while, catching their breaths. Jade wiggled slightly and Peony smiled into his neck, pulling out of Jade with exaggerated languidness while Jade started playing with Peony’s hair again. Everything was wet and salty and messy, and, "God, we should get cleaned up," Peony was saying, but it was Peony’s bed which was never quite neat, anyway.

"Mmm," Jade replied, closing his eyes. "It’s unlike you to be so conscientious."

"We have work tomorrow," Peony pointed out, pushing himself up by his elbows to look down at Jade.

"I shower in the morning," Jade said with a shrug, turning onto his side. Peony grumbled and fell into the mattress, behind Jade. He wrapped his arms around Jade’s waist, and it was amazing how squarely Peony’s forearms conformed to the space underneath Jade’s ribs, glued down by the sweat of their skin. Jade recalled, half-asleep, that whenever they’d fooled around as teenagers, Peony would leave soon after, making up some excuse like a group project or extra homework he needed to work on. Jade had known then that Peony was lying, but it hadn’t been in either of their natures yet to care for each others’ volatile emotional states. Jade could read Peony like a book. The response was the difficult part, humoring Peony to patch up his occasional dips in self-confidence, stopping him when he’d get petulant and threaten to leave on a whim, playing the game that the rest of the world called befriending one another and learning to trust that Peony would accept Jade no matter what response he gave.

Peony asked about Saphir weeks later, whether or not he was good in bed, and Jade wasn’t the jealous type, but he found himself instead mildly disturbed that Peony could inquire about that with a straight face. "Even if he’d been sober I wouldn’t have wanted to mess around with him," Jade said, rubbing his temples. Peony was leaning over his shoulder, curiously observing Jade mark up hundreds of midterms.

"But aren’t you curious?" Peony said.

"No, not particularly," Jade replied. "Unlike you, my tastes are a lot more refined."

Peony chuckled against Jade’s ear. "You know you’re just insulting yourself."

"It’s what I do best," Jade said, expression flat. "Besides, I wouldn’t date me either."

Peony took Jade’s glasses off and started massaging the back of Jade’s neck, rubbing circles into either side of the spine that protruded out whenever Jade leaned over. "Is this difficult for you?"

Jade shrugged, rolling his shoulders back when Peony hit a sore spot. The two of them never interacted in specifics, instead conversing in vague nebulas of _this_ , _they_ , and _that_. Jade knew Peony was talking about the relationship and easing back into getting to know each other between alternating dates and wild sex. "I’ve been through worse."

The answer seemed to appease Peony for a while as he continued to touch Jade, moving over his shoulders and toward his chest. "How’s Luke doing?"

"Better," Jade said with a reluctant smile. Peony noticed it, giving Jade’s shoulder a squeeze. "You saw him in class today. A lot more willing with his responses. I even saw him talking to Natalia Lanvaldear in the hall before class. She took this class last year and could be a good resource for him."

"The haircut suits him," Peony said.

Jade laughed. "Seems he’s gotten himself a private tutor, childhood friend. Another nice kid, Guy something. I’ve been sending some of the assignments to him through email." Jade noticed his mind fogging up again to the late afternoon haze and Peony’s soothing touches. "You know, if you show up here every day, people are going to start thinking you’re ignoring the elementary and middle schools."

"High schoolers need the most attention," Peony said. "Not my words, I swear. Besides, I’m just here to pick you up." He patted Jade’s shoulder, and Jade stood up, pushing the stack of papers to the side. Grading could wait. "Let’s get out of here."

"You make 'getting out of here' sound a lot more exciting than it actually is."

"Hey," Peony said, pouting. "I’ll take you out. I heard about this great seafood place downtown, and their shellfish is supposedly supreme. Almost as good as the old bars back in Keterburg."

And if picking Jade up piece by piece was all Peony could do, Jade knew he’d still have fallen in love with this overgrown boy-wonder of a man. Regretting it was all he could do to distance himself, but Peony would always come back and throw himself head first into Jade’s personal space. And, as if Jade were born half-empty, there would somehow always be room for two there.


End file.
